Becoming the Mum my daughter needed
Flowers thriving on a rocky cliff face
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How a life changing injury taught me to thrive
How I Discovered the Power of Resilience
How many of you feel like you’re giving everything to your family, leaving nothing for yourself?
I get it. For so long, I believed that my role as a mum was to focus all my energy outward—taking care of my family, friends, and everyone around me. But then, everything changed.
About a year ago in fact a year ago on Sunday, I suffered a fall that shattered my wrist, fracturing both my ulna and radius and dislocating my radio-ulnar joint. I thought it would be a simple fix - get some surgery, heal, and move on.
But it wasn’t that easy. After surgery, things took a turn for the worse: I developed an infection and blood clots on both of my lungs, which added trauma to my right lung.
This led to more hospital stays, blood thinners, and even emergency surgery after Christmas to clean out my arm and remove the plate and pins.
For eight months, I was unable to drive and had to rely on others for even the simplest tasks.
My life felt out of my control, and I was vulnerable. But throughout all the physical and emotional pain, something shifted. I realized that resilience isn’t just about surviving—it’s about thriving. It’s about learning to balance everything and put myself first.
Why Taking Care of Yourself Helps You Take Care of Her
This experience taught me a powerful lesson: We can’t show up for our families if we’re running on empty. When we’re overwhelmed or stressed, we can’t be the patient, calm, present mums we want to be.
Think about it: when we’re stressed or exhausted, we can’t be fully there for our daughters.
We also can’t teach them how to navigate life’s challenges if we’re not demonstrating the right tools ourselves. This isn’t just about feeling better—it’s about being better for the people we love.
The more we learn to care for our health and well-being, the better we can show up for our daughters, and the better we can build a deeper, more connected relationship with them.
It’s not just about taking care of the basics—like sleep, nutrition, and exercise. It’s about understanding what’s happening in our bodies and learning to recognise stress signals before they escalate.
Building a Bridge Between You and Your Daughter
I’ve learned that tuning into your body’s signals can help you connect with your daughter in ways you might not expect. Our bodies are constantly sending us messages.
When you start paying attention to how you’re feeling - physically and emotionally - you can understand what your daughter might be going through too. That’s when real connection happens.
Imagine you and your daughter are both having a tough day. Emotions are high, tempers flare, and words are said that you don’t mean. Instead of reacting, you both pause and check in with yourself. Is your heart racing? Are your muscles tense? That’s your body’s stress response.
Once you recognise it, you can use tools like deep breathing to calm yourself. By modelling this for your daughter, you teach her a valuable skill she can use when she feels overwhelmed. You both pause, reset, and reconnect.
Empathy starts with understanding yourself first.
The Science of Health and Human Potential
Let’s take a moment to talk about science. When our bodies are in a calm, balanced state, our brains function better, our bodies heal faster, and we can respond to life’s challenges in healthier ways.
But when we’re stressed, our body goes into “fight or flight” mode, releasing hormones that make us more reactive and less able to think clearly.
It’s not just us adults—our daughters experience this too, especially as teens when their brains are still developing. Stress can overwhelm them in ways they don’t fully understand. But the good news is that we can teach them how to manage it.
There are three areas where small, intentional steps can have a profound impact on stress levels for both you and your daughter:
1. Understanding Stress and Emotional Regulation: When we understand our body’s stress response, we can begin teaching ourselves and our daughters how to manage it. Techniques like deep breathing, grounding exercises, or simply pausing when emotions run high can help us shift into a more balanced state.
2. Nutrition and Sleep: We all know that sleep and nutrition impact our moods and energy. When we don’t get enough rest or eat poorly, stress builds up faster. The good news is that small changes - like sticking to a consistent bedtime or ensuring balanced meals - can have a huge effect on our emotional state.
3. Movement and Breathwork: Movement and breathwork are some of the most profound tools I’ve discovered. When we’re stressed, our bodies flood with hormones that tell us we’re in danger. But by simply moving our bodies - walking, stretching, or even standing up - we release built-up tension and lower stress hormones. Breathwork also helps calm us. When we take deep, intentional breaths, especially with a longer exhale, we signal to our brain that we’re safe, shifting from a state of stress to calm.
My Invitation to You
This journey has shown me that taking care of ourselves isn’t a luxury - it’s a necessity. To thrive, to connect, and to build strong relationships, we need to put ourselves first. By understanding our bodies and managing our stress, we can show up for our families in the best way possible - and create space for our daughters to do the same.
I’d love for you to join me on this journey.
Start by tracking your mood, trying a simple breathwork exercise, or paying attention to when you’re hungry or tired - and then taking action. These small steps can build the resilience and balance you need to thrive, not just survive.
I’m excited to offer two opportunities for you to dive deeper into this journey:
1. Join the Mum2Mum Connection Waitlist: This is a community where mums come together to learn about health, stress management, and building resilience. Get access to tools to help you and your daughter manage stress, create balance, and strengthen your bond.
2. Glow Groups Open Day: For those of you ready to bring your daughter along, the Glow Groups Open Day is an introduction to the Glow Group for teen girls. You and your daughter can experience a session for yourselves, ask questions, and explore the science of physiology. Leave confident knowing that your daughter has a safe, supportive space designed just for her.
I’m here to support you on this journey.
Let’s take it together - building resilience, understanding, and connection every step of the way. Are you ready?
At the end of the day, this is about more than just feeling better.
It’s about building the kind of relationship you’ve always dreamed of with your daughter. It’s about showing her that she can handle life’s challenges with calm and confidence—just like you.
Together, we can thrive.
Let’s start this journey now!
Rach x
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