This week I am full of snot but instead of pushing through and being a human do-er, I have taken time out to support my physical health and wellbeing. which is why you find me resting on the sofa instead of being out and about.

I wanted to stay how important rest is, how important it is for us as women but also how important it is for our teen daughters. If we don’t put yourselves first to take the time to rest and recuperate, then all our daughters are seeing is that they cannot take time for themselves and they have to keep do, do, do, doing all the time.

Whatever type of learner they are - so whether they’re kinaesthetic, visual or auditory - they learn by what they see. Part of my role as the Teen Whisperer/Connection Coach, I talk about taking time for yourself and putting your needs first, having the time so you have the headspace, time and energy to focus in on whatever is going on for them.

Without taking that time for you, you haven’t got the headspace or time to go ‘ok this is what’s going on, let’s focus on …. and help her’ . If you haven’t got the energy to manage your day, you haven’t got the energy for yourself, nor do you have the patience to help her in her life.

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So yeh rest is highly important, if you’ve been following me on instagram for a while, you’ll know that I do a connection day every Sunday and connection day is so important as it’s a day you put aside to connect to yourself and your teen daughter.

Taking the time for myself to listen in to what my body needed, to calm, relax and chill.

Rest is so important for us as women and for Mums of teenagers. If we don’t take time to put ourselves first and rest and recuperate when we need to, then all our daughters are seeing is that they can’t take time for themselves and they have to do do all the time.

So whether they are a kinaesthetic or visual learner, that’s what they’re going to see and even if they’re an auditory learner, there still gonna see the fact that you don’t take time for yourself which is why part of who I am is all about putting yourself first and taking timeout for yourself, having the time so then you have the headspace so you have the time and energy to be able to focus on whatever is going on for them.

Without taking this time back, you haven’t got that headspace, you haven’t got that time to be able to go ok this is what’s going on, let’s focus on this and help her.

If you haven’t got the energy to manage what’s going on in your day, you haven’t got the energy for yourself and you haven’t got the energy to focus on your teen daughter.

I was able to take a step back and rest, my time was MY time whatever. I took the the time for myself and rested - 90% of the time in bed which is totally unheard of for me but I needed it. As you know I am rarely inside let alone in bed. Most of my podcasts are recorded outside in nature normally when walking the dog.

Having connection day for myself helped me to prioritise my mental, emotional and physical health so that I was able to succumb to the lung when it hit. I was knackered and run down and needed to take a day for myself - it was great for my emotional and physical health.

If I had pushed through it as society and culture regularly tells us to by taking the tablets, to keep going when you’re feeling crap which isn’t good for your mental or physical health.

If your teen daughters sees you putting yourself last, that’s what she is going to do. She will think that she has to be a human do-er not a human be-ing and keep going until she hits that rock bottom and can’t do anything for anyone else.

By making time for you NOW, means your teen daughter can see what you’re doing, she can see that you make space for yourself each and every day and she can do that for herself too.

After all we do not predominately learn by what we hear, we learn by what we do and see. At the end of the day of the day all we want is to be seen, heard and valued and we’re not going to be seen, heard or valued.

If you keep pushing yourself through things, if you keep making everyone’s else’s things, your responsibility. It’s got nothing to do with you. By you backing off and taking time for yourself, allows those people to take up the reins to do what they need to do. It actually becomes a ripple effect and it becomes a really magical way of seeing other people support themselves.

On this note I have just launched details of my retreat for Mums with one for Mums and Teen Girls later on in the year. NOTE date change - the retreat is now on the 9th-11th June in the wonderful Borrowdale Valley in the Lake District, and initially is just for Mums of Teen Girls. I have decided on a tweak to coincide with the Disconnect to Connection roadmap which is launched as part of the Community Membership - 4 steps to building a relationship based on trust and resect, with your teen daughter. The first step is to connect in with YOU, as a woman not just as a Mum of teen girl.

It’s a weekend of nourishment, to relax and chill without the distractions at home. You go home relaxed and recuperated and ready to use the tools throughout your day to day lives.

If you’re interested in finding out more, check out my website or click on the link below.

Alternatively if you would like to work with me either on a 1:1, with your teen daughter or as part of the community membership, check out all details via my website or click on one of the links below.

Take care

Rachel x

Let’s build a community of like minded Mums, imperfectly parenting together

If you would like to find out more, check out my website

Vox me on Voxer (a walkie talkie app)

I’m on Instagram at teen.whisperer.nature

I’m also opening a slot in my diary for a Teen Whisperer 90mins Power Call where you can tell me what’s happening for your teenage daughter so click the link and book in

If you would love to reconnect with your teen daughter and have the relationship you’ve always dreamt of, check out my work - all based on the Disconnection to Connection roadmap to building a deeper relationship.

Teen Whisperer Community

New Retreat for Mums

The Ripple Effect Joint Programme with your Teen Daughter

Teen Whisperer Individual Mentoring

Teen Whisperer 90mins Power Call

Feel free to get in touch or book in a call to talk more.

I look forward to connecting with you and working with you, take care Rachel x

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