Are you ready…ready to be the real you?

Every day is a fresh start written in a notepad in black ink

So for anyone who has looked at my website positivetouch.net you will see that I am passionate about teens, and in particular self-care for Mums of teens and those teens actually, about putting themselves first. 

 

Why I help mums of teen girls

Now some people will say to me well why? Why are you focusing on mums of teens, why don’t you focus on Mums of little kids? The reason is there’s lots of support out there for Mums of little kids, there’s not so much for Mums of teens, in fact, there’s not much at all.

So as a Mum of a teen myself, my daughter is 16 and she has chronic ill health so that makes me a Parent Carer. The kind of understanding by general society is that you’ve done it, you’ve sorted it, it’s all ok and you can manage it on your own.

But actually, the reality so many of us are floundering, floundering because we’ve got no one to just go, actually do you know what you’re feeling is normal? Don’t put yourself down about it, don’t feel you have to be this wonderful superwoman who can do the whole full-time work, plus looking after your teen, plus being in and out of school, plus doing all the stuff at home.

 

Why putting yourself first helps everyone

None of that is real. That’s just a portrayal that is put on us from either a young age or as we go through school or work, and this is how you are supposed to be. But this is fake, it’s totally fake and what you need to do is focus on yourself and what you can do for your family.

So by that, I’m meaning:

if you spend time looking after yourself putting your needs first, your teen then mirrors that behaviour.

However, if you spend your time putting yourself last each and every time and not thinking about your needs or not thinking about how you are feeling or not thinking about what’s going on for you right now, then your teen is going to mirror that exact behaviour.

They’re not going to look after themselves either and that makes it really really hard because your role as a parent becomes doubly hard. Not only are you not looking after yourself, but you are also putting all your effort, time and energy into looking after your teen.

Honestly, it is that simple, to turn your life around you need to focus on you. To turn your teen’s life around, you’re not there to control them, that’s their job but you’re there to guide and support them with whatever is going on for them right now.

 

The ripple effect of self-care

So as I say, if you put yourself first then they learn to put themselves first. It’s like the ripple effect  – to throw a stone into a flat piece of water like a lake, then as that stone drops it creates air around it that then makes ripples gong out and out and out and out and out as far as the eye can see.

That’s what self-care does to you, it literally has a ripple effect on those around you.

Not only does it affect you, it also affects your immediate family at home, the rest of your family, community, work colleagues, people you see in the street, absolutely everybody.

It is absolutely mind-blowing and to be truthful once you’ve put that step in place to give yourself that time, it’s really quite simple and that’s what my job is to empower you to put yourself first by giving you small actionable tips each and every day. So if you’re interested honestly do get in touch. I won’t laugh at you, judge you, belittle you. We are all parents of teen girls at the end of the day. I’ve been there where you are now so honestly just give me a call or a text or email and we can get talking. We can change your life around.

 

What’s next for positivetouch.net?

Over the next few weeks, I will be adding a podcast called Stop Juggling Start Living as well as this blog, nothing like being slightly mad is there? My reasoning is that I am so passionate about helping stressed-out mums and teen daughters that I feel I really want to push myself way out of my comfort zone to get the message out there.

Self-care is so needed right now and we need to show a united front.

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The truth about being a Mum of a teen…